I've always been an independent person. I actually quite enjoy doing things alone. But traveling alone in Indonesia had me a bit nervous and excited. I knew (and definitely now know) that it would be a time of self discover and growth. I was a bit fearful (probably not as much as my parents). I think it's because I've really only done travel with others. I've traveled to some places on my own but I've either met up with people at the destination or have traveled to those places before. I like many, fear stepping out of my comfort zone, alas stepping out is how you grow. I think my friends at Göddigt ändå say it best "Life begins at the edge of your comfort zone". It wasn't that I was necessarily fearful to travel alone, it was more that I was nervous about being alone.

I've now been traveling alone for 3 days. The beginning was rough. Actually rougher than I expected. I know that it was rough for me because I had been traveling up until that point with some of my best friends from exchange and the last two days with two of my best guy friends from exchange. It was already super hard for me when I had said goodbye to my two best girl friends from exchange.

I had created amazing memories with them, laughed, cried, partied, went on hikes, explored, cooked meals together. It was really hard to say goodbye because they live in Europe so I know it will be a long time before I see them again. When Sarah-Louise and Ivana left, I still had a community of friends there with me. This time when I said goodbye I was all alone. It actually felt like a real goodbye (even though I know it's really a see ya later). No one there for me, no one to talk to about how I felt, no one to help me, no one to hog the blanket when I had to split a bed. Also because it's the Holiday season and I'm so close to going home I've been missing my family a bit more.

It was an emotional goodbye. I knew it would be. After about 30 minutes of me wiping tears and trying to figure out what I was going to do by myself, I realized one of the greatest things about traveling alone: I finally had time to myself. Time to catch up on journaling; time to think; time to plan out more of my trip; time to relax; time to do what I want when I wanted to; and time to blog more :)

I took a scooter up to a cliff side restaurant, sipped on a smoothie, journaled, and soaked up the beautiful scenery that is Kuta, Lombok. I was still tearing up but I felt much more at peace. I spent one more night at the homestay. I cried. I cried about missing my family; I cried about missing my friends at home; I cried about missing my friends from exchange; I cried about the poverty I witnessed; I cried about how lucky I am; I cried about things that made no sense to cry about. And I cried just to cry and it was good and natural to cry.

No filter needed for Lombok's beauty. This is the view from the cafe

I woke up the next morning ready to go to Sengiggi. I was still a bit teary but I had worked out my travel plans more and feel really good about the rest of my trip.

I actually had talked to a girl at the hostel I stayed at in Sengiggi and she said that after two days of traveling alone, you get used to it and it becomes really fun and really good. I have to agree with her- after two days something clicked and traveling alone felt good, it felt right.

I had an awesome day to myself diving to see a waterfall - I will post about that later. I chose to eat at a restaurant because part of their menu was also in German and they had Bavarian Pretzels and German bread. I needed a break from noodles and rice. So yes I ate bread with butter and pretzels for dinner. And yes, it was delicious. I did that because I wanted to and no one was there to tell me no.

There is so much freedom provided by traveling alone. I had to ask others to take me picture at the waterfall. I've had to make an effort to connect with those at my hostel and ask others for advice. I had to rely on myself and locals to get me to where I wanted to go. I had to figure out how I was going to get myself out of situations. It's only up to me to say yes or no. Even though I haven't been traveling alone for that long, I can already see self growth and discovery and it is amazing.

While it's had its rough patches, overall traveling alone has been great. It's something that I think everyone should try. I'm so glad that I've been provided this opportunity. It is also true that travel is so much fun with others. You create so many memories when you travel and it is amazing to share those memories with others. You can debrief your day, have buddies to help you out, get discounts, split costs, and strengthen bonds. I think I want a mix of both in my life. I still have a few more days of traveling alone, and I also get to see some friends on journey back home. Since I have all this "time to myself" I'll be keeping you guys updated on the rest of my travels.